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buttless_wonder
12-12-2011, 02:02 PM
This is the funniest automobile review I have EVAR read.

Before reading check out these specs and try not to laugh.
Specifications
VEHICLE TYPE: rear-motor, rear-wheel-drive, 2-passenger, 3-door hatchback
PRICE AS TESTED: $599/month
plus $2500 down (48-month lease only)
MOTOR TYPE: DC permanent-magnet, 40 hp, 89 lb-ft
TRANSMISSION: 1-speed direct drive
DIMENSIONS:
Wheelbase: 73.5 in Length: 106.1 in
Width: 61.4 in Height: 60.7 in
Curb weight: 2077 lb
C/D TEST RESULTS:Zero to 60 mph: 23.4 sec
Street start, 5–60 mph: 23 sec
Standing ¼-mile: 22.2 sec @ 59 mph
Top speed (governor limited): 63 mph
Braking, 60–0 mph: 131 ft
Roadholding, 300-ft-dia skidpad*: 0.69 g
FUEL ECONOMY:
EPA city/highway driving: 94/79 MPGe
C/D observed: 66 MPGe
*Stability-control-inhibitedHoly Shit!
It takes more than 1/4 mile to hit 60 MPH.

-------------------

Sept Car and Driver (http://www.caranddriver.com/reviews/2011-smart-fortwo-electric-drive-road-test-reviews)


Your narrator, the man who is about to pass judgment on the transportation module pictured here, never even drove it home from the office, much less on a road trip during which he would encounter useful insights about the electric-powered Smart ED’s handling. And, yes before we go any farther, this car has an “ED” sticker on each flank. Just settle down with your Cialis quips. We’ve heard them (or made them) all already. It stands for “Electric Drive,” okay?And drive it does, in a manner. It hums to 60 mph in 23.4 seconds, by which point it has already covered more than a quarter-mile of perfectly good pavement. The Smart ED is nearly as quick as a 1981 Chevrolet Chevette diesel (21.2 seconds). And that car had the word “vette” right in its name. The Smart does not. Like the Chevette, though, the Smart ED is rear-wheel drive.We were mentioning how little we drove the ED, but that’s not really true. Cumulatively, we did cover some miles and used up some of our lives operating this thing. We just did it in spurts, is all. We took it to lunch every day for a week. And yes, people laughed at us. To keep ourselves entertained, we investigated how much of our lunch commute we could perform at absolute full throttle. Turns out, most of it could be handled in this fashion. In fact, if you are not actively on the brakes, you’ll likely have it floored. Another upside: You’ll use the car’s full performance potential (40 horsepower in this case) more often than you will in any other form of transport you’re likely to operate.

http://media.caranddriver.com/images/media/51/2011-smart-fortwo-electric-drive-inline-photo-410506-s-original.jpg (http://www.caranddriver.com/photo-gallery/2011-smart-fortwo-electric-drive-road-test-reviews-car-and-driver)







Did you know that the new Smart ED was created from a human baby’s first laugh? It’s true.When a member of our illustrious track-testing team brought the performance-results sheet to our desk, we admit that we snickered until we saw the braking perform*ance number. “Holy cow!” we said. “It stopped in 131 feet?! That’s better than a ZR1 (http://www.caranddriver.com/reviews/2009-chevrolet-corvette-zr1-first-drive-review). That’s awesome—wait, what?” Turns out, the Smart ED is not actually fast enough to stop. It’s governed to a top speed of 63 mph, and our standard brake test is from 70 mph to standstill. So we did it from 60 mph because, well, it doesn’t actually matter.The lesson here is that not only is the ED’s range insufficient for those of us with lengthy daily commutes, it also would turn us into a rolling chicane. And we’ve got enough problems already. According to the EPA, the Smart ED’s range is 63 miles, but you can literally watch the charge from the 16.5-kWh, Tesla-sourced lithium-ion battery drain away after a brief, maxed-out expressway stint. Smart promises that in 2012, it will begin selling a version of the ED with batteries developed in a joint venture between Daimler and Bosch.

http://media.caranddriver.com/images/media/51/2011-smart-fortwo-electric-drive-inline-2-photo-410508-s-original.jpg (http://www.caranddriver.com/photo-gallery/2011-smart-fortwo-electric-drive-road-test-reviews-car-and-driver)







We took the Smart ED for a couple of terrifying trips on an expressway posting a speed limit higher than the Smart’s. The less said of this, the better. Except we note, with some pride, that we actually managed to pass a ’90s Buick LeSabre. That the Buick driver was possibly not entirely conscious at the time is not our fault.Oh, another upside: Because the ED’s transmission is a single-speed, direct-drive arrangement, you won’t have to endure the brutal wallops delivered with every shift of the gas version’s automated manual.So there you have it. With the ED, Smart has finally made its runabout into the golf cart that it has always wanted it to be. Well, except without room for your clubs. What do you think this is? A Nissan Leaf (http://www.caranddriver.com/reviews/2011-nissan-leaf-sl-long-term-road-test-car-and-driver)?It is not a Leaf. A Leaf is quicker, faster, has a longer range, and feels remarkably like an automobile that non-clowns might drive. You can also buy a Leaf; you can only lease a Smart ED. And, oh, at $599 per month (plus $2500 down on a four-year lease), the Smart ED is also more expensive than the Leaf. Smart notes in its press materials that there is not currently a waiting list for the 250 EDs it intends to unload in the U.S

Zythirin
12-13-2011, 06:46 AM
This is the funniest automobile review I have EVAR read.

Before reading check out these specs and try not to laugh.
Specifications
VEHICLE TYPE: rear-motor, rear-wheel-drive, 2-passenger, 3-door hatchback
PRICE AS TESTED: $599/month
plus $2500 down (48-month lease only)
MOTOR TYPE: DC permanent-magnet, 40 hp, 89 lb-ft
TRANSMISSION: 1-speed direct drive
DIMENSIONS:
Wheelbase: 73.5 in Length: 106.1 in
Width: 61.4 in Height: 60.7 in
Curb weight: 2077 lb
C/D TEST RESULTS:Zero to 60 mph: 23.4 sec
Street start, 5–60 mph: 23 sec
Standing ¼-mile: 22.2 sec @ 59 mph
Top speed (governor limited): 63 mph
Braking, 60–0 mph: 131 ft
Roadholding, 300-ft-dia skidpad*: 0.69 g
FUEL ECONOMY:
EPA city/highway driving: 94/79 MPGe
C/D observed: 66 MPGe
*Stability-control-inhibitedHoly Shit!
It takes more than 1/4 mile to hit 60 MPH.

-------------------

Sept Car and Driver (http://www.caranddriver.com/reviews/2011-smart-fortwo-electric-drive-road-test-reviews)


Your narrator, the man who is about to pass judgment on the transportation module pictured here, never even drove it home from the office, much less on a road trip during which he would encounter useful insights about the electric-powered Smart ED’s handling. And, yes before we go any farther, this car has an “ED” sticker on each flank. Just settle down with your Cialis quips. We’ve heard them (or made them) all already. It stands for “Electric Drive,” okay?And drive it does, in a manner. It hums to 60 mph in 23.4 seconds, by which point it has already covered more than a quarter-mile of perfectly good pavement. The Smart ED is nearly as quick as a 1981 Chevrolet Chevette diesel (21.2 seconds). And that car had the word “vette” right in its name. The Smart does not. Like the Chevette, though, the Smart ED is rear-wheel drive.We were mentioning how little we drove the ED, but that’s not really true. Cumulatively, we did cover some miles and used up some of our lives operating this thing. We just did it in spurts, is all. We took it to lunch every day for a week. And yes, people laughed at us. To keep ourselves entertained, we investigated how much of our lunch commute we could perform at absolute full throttle. Turns out, most of it could be handled in this fashion. In fact, if you are not actively on the brakes, you’ll likely have it floored. Another upside: You’ll use the car’s full performance potential (40 horsepower in this case) more often than you will in any other form of transport you’re likely to operate.

http://media.caranddriver.com/images/media/51/2011-smart-fortwo-electric-drive-inline-photo-410506-s-original.jpg (http://www.caranddriver.com/photo-gallery/2011-smart-fortwo-electric-drive-road-test-reviews-car-and-driver)







Did you know that the new Smart ED was created from a human baby’s first laugh? It’s true.When a member of our illustrious track-testing team brought the performance-results sheet to our desk, we admit that we snickered until we saw the braking perform*ance number. “Holy cow!” we said. “It stopped in 131 feet?! That’s better than a ZR1 (http://www.caranddriver.com/reviews/2009-chevrolet-corvette-zr1-first-drive-review). That’s awesome—wait, what?” Turns out, the Smart ED is not actually fast enough to stop. It’s governed to a top speed of 63 mph, and our standard brake test is from 70 mph to standstill. So we did it from 60 mph because, well, it doesn’t actually matter.The lesson here is that not only is the ED’s range insufficient for those of us with lengthy daily commutes, it also would turn us into a rolling chicane. And we’ve got enough problems already. According to the EPA, the Smart ED’s range is 63 miles, but you can literally watch the charge from the 16.5-kWh, Tesla-sourced lithium-ion battery drain away after a brief, maxed-out expressway stint. Smart promises that in 2012, it will begin selling a version of the ED with batteries developed in a joint venture between Daimler and Bosch.

http://media.caranddriver.com/images/media/51/2011-smart-fortwo-electric-drive-inline-2-photo-410508-s-original.jpg (http://www.caranddriver.com/photo-gallery/2011-smart-fortwo-electric-drive-road-test-reviews-car-and-driver)







We took the Smart ED for a couple of terrifying trips on an expressway posting a speed limit higher than the Smart’s. The less said of this, the better. Except we note, with some pride, that we actually managed to pass a ’90s Buick LeSabre. That the Buick driver was possibly not entirely conscious at the time is not our fault.Oh, another upside: Because the ED’s transmission is a single-speed, direct-drive arrangement, you won’t have to endure the brutal wallops delivered with every shift of the gas version’s automated manual.So there you have it. With the ED, Smart has finally made its runabout into the golf cart that it has always wanted it to be. Well, except without room for your clubs. What do you think this is? A Nissan Leaf (http://www.caranddriver.com/reviews/2011-nissan-leaf-sl-long-term-road-test-car-and-driver)?It is not a Leaf. A Leaf is quicker, faster, has a longer range, and feels remarkably like an automobile that non-clowns might drive. You can also buy a Leaf; you can only lease a Smart ED. And, oh, at $599 per month (plus $2500 down on a four-year lease), the Smart ED is also more expensive than the Leaf. Smart notes in its press materials that there is not currently a waiting list for the 250 EDs it intends to unload in the U.S
Sad excuse for a car....

buttless_wonder
12-13-2011, 12:54 PM
As stated in the article, Smart has finally made the golf cart they were aiming for. All it needs now is room for a couple of golf bags.

Faulty Circuit
12-31-2011, 01:15 PM
A horse and buggy would be fine for me, in high school I had a wood shop Teacher and he took an old 2 cycle motor and made a wooden carriage identical to one of the first horseless carriages, they had no steering wheel per se, but used that funny looking cane handle and they used tall skinny rubber tired spoked wheels. It had a cloth surrey top with fringe and the body was hand lacquered with four or five coats of Black, it was sharp and looked like the real car looked. He even made a belt drive reverse system for it, and I feel pretty sure it would run more than 6o mph, it was licensed to drive on the street, he drove it to school everyday the entire time I was there. Myself all I ever managed to build was a wooden bench so the sisters and brother could all sit at the dinner table.



http://i40.tinypic.com/25p3crp.gif

MrRee
01-04-2012, 04:58 PM
Renault and Ford have joined forces to create the perfect small car
for women.

Mixing the Renault 'Clio' and the Ford 'Taurus' they have designed the
'Clitaurus'. It comes in pink, and the average male car thief won't be
able to find it - let alone turn it on - even if someone tells him where
it is and how to do it.

Rumor has it though, that it leaks transmission fluid once a month, and
can be a real bitch to start in the morning! Some have reported that on
cold winter mornings, when you really need it, you can't get it to turn over.

New models are initially fun to own, but very costly to maintain, and
horribly expensive to get rid of. Used models may initially appear to have
curb appeal and a low price, but eventually have an increased appetite for
fuel, and the curb weight typically increases with age. Manufacturers are
baffled as to how the size of the trunk increases, but say that the paint
may just make it LOOK bigger.

This model is not expected to reach collector status. Most owners find it
is best to lease one, and replace it each year.